Things You Thought You Would NEVER Say...

Kale! If you eat another of your shirts I'm going to make you go without clothing.

Aug 26, 2011

And you think you've had a wierd day?

My day actually started yesterday.
My mom's dog Shimalfinne, (say it with me now SHIM-ALL-FINN-EE), has been loosing hair and we were afraid she had something really bad so I had to take her to the vet.
The thing you have to understand about Shimal is that when we got her she had wounds around her neck and ever since she's never, ever, NEVER been able to be on a collar or leash. So I had to corner her and lay on her to get the harness and leash on. The thing is, when you put that on her she goes into this defensive, almost catatonic state where she won't get up or move at all.
So I got to carry her up the stairs and to the car. Then from the car to the vet's office and from the waiting area to the scale. She weighs 69.7 pounds in case you were wondering. Turns out she has allergies. I didn't know dogs could get that. We're giving her the steroids and antibiotics the doctor prescribed and she's already scratching less.
Today I had to get the alignment on the car fixed so as soon as I dropped the kids off at school I went to Elroy's. Bobby, the owner, is Xandra's grandpa so I knew he would do it right without screwing us. He said I had to leave the car there until 3 pm so I decided to take the bus to downtown and go window shopping.
I had barely gone two blocks when people started asking me for cigarettes, food and money. I was polite when I told them no. The only money I had was for bus fare and to pay for the alignment. Then this one man asked me for a cigarette. I told him sorry, but I don't smoke. He didn't believe me so he started following me and talking me to death. He said he knew I had some smokes and it was rude of me not to share. After about the sixth time of telling him no he started yelling at me. He cursed and ranted and called me every foul word he knew. When he finally turned around to walk away from me he yelled, Why don't you go run home to your daddy you spoiled (B-word).
I wanted to yell at him that my father was dead, plus some choice insults and curses, but he was finally leaving and I didn't want to start him up again.
I got on a bus and rode it to the 16th street mall. I have to say that the beggars in downtown Denver are a lot nicer than the one's in Lakewood.
I wanted to go to Amoo's work and I had about 20 minutes until the bus came so I went to Starbucks and blew $6 on pumpkin bread and a caramel frappucino. I was having a crappy day and I felt I deserved a treat.
While eating I saw Albus Dumbledore walking down the sidewalk outside the coffee shop. I'm not kidding. There was a man wearing purple robes and a purple pointed wizard's hat. He had a long, white beard and had a knotted walking stick as tall as he was. He stopped at each little tree planted in the sidewalk and poured bread crumbs on the ground for the pigeons and other birds.
It was awesome. I needed the humor after the trying morning I'd had.
I rode the bus to Amoo's work and did some filing until 1:30 when Amoo's co-worker, Lyle took me back to Elroy's. He had to take the checks to the company bank anyway and it was pretty close.
I got the car from Bobby and went to pick up the boys from school. Traffic sucked donkey dong so it was a close thing. I had to go strait from there to pick up Amoo from work.
I'm home now AT LAST and I've had a shower and now I'm gonna be so lazy.
It's gonna rock!


Jun 16, 2011

Distraction News

Okay, okay...

So I've been neglecting my blogspot a little... well a lot.

The problem is that when the kids are home they stand over me every time I get onto the computer and rapid fire questions and comments at me until I get off said computer out of pure irritation.

Example: Right now Kale is standing to my right telling me about how awesome Minecraft is while Phoenix, left, is reading everything I'm typing.

Not distracting at all, really.

The kids are out of school now and I find myself extremely occupied every day. They want constant entertainment but I'm just used to being alone all day, so it's a change to have Kale attached to me 24/7 and Phoenix going more than 10 minutes without complaining about having to do homework.

Before school ended I went on two field trips. Phoenix's class went downtown to see all the historical stuff and Kale's class went to the aquarium. Thanks to the camera Tobi, technological guru and bringer of everything wonderful, gave me I took many, many, MANY pictures.

The Molly Brown house was awesome and my pictures of jellyfish turned out great.

Kale in the background: How much more longer till you're done? I want to play Minecraft!

Phoenix in the background: I called the computer first!

(Not distracting at all.)


Phoenix earned his bobcat badge in scouts and he's going to day camp starting the 20th. He's really excited.

Kale has actually made some progress with his anxieties and his psychologist is encouraged by his attitude.

Phoenix: Can I say that I'm bored while waiting for you to get off the computer?

Me: Only if you want to clean.

Kale: Can he clean my room?

(Nope, still not distracting.)

Yesterday I took the kids to work with me.

I have no idea what the hell I was thinking so don't ask.

While I was cleaning the upstairs Phoenix got into Amoo's desk and found her lighter. She called me this morning to inform me that he burned part of her desk. I gave him the talk about playing with fire, which made him cry, which made me feel like a monster for being mean to my son.

I think he won't do it again, he was really sorry and scared. Especially when I told him how Josh's twin sisters burned their whole house down at the age of 14 because they were playing with matches.

Kale followed me around the building trying to hack into every computer in the place, which is a lot, so I finally sent him downstairs to wait for me.

Big mistake.

When I came down Phoenix and Kale had scratches and bruises all over themselves because they had gotten into an argument and decided the best way to resolve said argument was utilizing the ancient and manly art of fisticuffs.

I'm telling you... It's hard to reprimand your kids when they are saying things like, "Phoenix sat on my face and farted," or "Kale scratched me inside my nostril."

Then they got into another fist fight while telling me how their brother had slighted their honor. While breaking up that second fight I burst into laughter and ruined the stern Mommy face.

Kale: Britt?

Me: What?

Kale: Are you done yet?

Phoenix: Does she look done to you?

Kale: Shut up!

Phoenix: No, you shut up!

Kale: Britt! Phoenix is annoying me... on purpose!

(I'm not distracted, I swear.)

I shall leave you now with these tantalizing words of wisdom.