Things You Thought You Would NEVER Say...

Kale! If you eat another of your shirts I'm going to make you go without clothing.

Jan 17, 2010

Lets get ready to RUMBLE!

Today is Kale's birthday... Hippo Birdie Ewe Ewe.
On Friday Sparky called and managed to convince Kale to come to Chucky Cheese so their side of the family could wish him a happy birthday and give him his presents.
For once he was excited to see his grandma and grandpa, but especially excited to see his sisters.
So yesterday Phoenix, Kale, Dakota and I went to the seventh circle of hell, otherwise known as 'Chucky Cheese.' I hate that place but last night was especially bad because everyone, and I mean everyone, was there. It was so packed that we had to clean our own table just to have a place to sit. It was also very, very, very hot. Like how it gets in a mosh pit at a heavy metal concert. There were so many people and they were all in my personal space.
I'm a little claustrophobic and the people all around me were not enhancing my calm. But I stuck it out with a smile for the kids.
I gave Dakota fifty tokens and he was off with Phoenix when we found James and Addie. They told us where they were sitting and that they had saved us a table so I moved all our stuff to their section.
Addie loves her brother and she's at that very cute age where she gets so excited and has to tell everyone how she feels. "Is Kale! Kale! My Kale!" I mean, it just doesn't get cuter than that. His other sisters, Presley and Lilly, were considerably less excited about him and more happy to be chewing on anything they could get their hands on. But they're babies, I expected no less. They are getting so big and Lilly is chunky, just like Kale was as a baby.
Kale opened his presents, he made out like a bandit, and posed for so many pictures with his family. He was getting tired of it so he slipped away from the table and went to the giant gerbil cage to crawl in the tubes. I grabbed Phoenix and sent him in to get Kale and bring him back to the table. While he was inside James came to get me. I guess Kale was back at our table and was freaking out because he couldn't find any of us and thought we had left him with Sparky. I went to the table and tried my best to calm him down.
In the middle of Kale throwing the fit Sparky decides it's time for Kale to take a picture with his father, stepmother, and his three sisters. Sure it was a good idea, but the timing was less than stellar. So, of course, he didn't want to let go of me just yet. In his mind I had left him and he'd just gotten me back. He's still afraid of his grandmother and knows that everyone in that family is on her side. He seems to think that they will turn him over to her care.
Were his fears crazy? Maybe. But he's a little kid. You can't reason with a five year old, they're not rational creatures.
So, Kale didn't want to leave me to get his picture taken. Just when I had convinced him to pose for the picture, that I would stay where he could see me the whole time, Sparky starts packing up their shit and ranting at Kale.
It was loud and I had trouble hearing it all but the gist of it was that she was mad at Kale for not showing any interest in her and the family, that he was more interested in the presents than the people.
(I know what you're thinking, "no! a five year old more interested in presents than people, it can't be!" You feel me?)
Then, to seal the deal, she put her finger in his face and called him a "very f*@$ing selfish little boy!"
I asked Sparky why she had to go and do that. Why did she have to turn it into a fight? She said she could tell when she wasn't wanted and if Kale had what he'd come for then she would just leave.
(Can you hear my heart breaking? No! Say it ain't so!)
Andrew missed the ranting and after talking to his mother asked me why I had been so mean to his mother. I told him that she stuck her finger in Kale's face and what she said.
For a split second, I saw disappointment in his eyes. I think deep down he knows that his mother caused a fight and was angry with her. But who knows? Maybe I saw what I wanted to see. He said that Kale was a selfish little boy.
I told him, "Of course he is! He's a five year old. You can't expect him to behave like an adult when he's just a little boy."
Honestly, I think Andrew understands my side of the argument. But his mother is his mother, and she's also his free babysitter. With a set of twins and another little girl to be watched while he's at work... Would you give it up just to speak your mind? I'm not saying he's a wuss... Okay, maybe I am, but I can see why he would take her side.
Everyone left with her. I think they're all afraid to go against her and you can tell she's the one who tells everyone else what to do because they all followed her out like lemmings.
Kale, of course, was upset. He was almost in tears when he told me he didn't know what he had done wrong and why was his grandma being so mean to him?
Yeah, happy birthday to you Kale.
I stayed in that hell on earth for another hour and a half to try cheering him up. We spent all of the tokens and eventually Kale forgot about the drama so he could concentrate on all the fun games and picking out his prizes.
So, other than the grudge match and insult slinging, it was a great birthday celebration.
I swear! I'm never going to that Chucky Cheese again.
Later
BD
P.S. The date on my camera is one day slow. These were taken on the sixteenth.

3 comments:

Mammallama said...

I'm only going to say: Do you feel all cool after you curse out a 4 year old?
Neither do I.
You can NOT buy that boys love or respect.

Tobi said...

Bravo to you BD for not decking Sparky then and there. I would have a really hard time maintaining my cool if someone spoke to my children like that. Sparky is so.....I don't know they haven't invented a word for her kind of crazy yet.

p.s. I should have read this post first. Ignore the first part of my comment on your most recent post. =)

Unknown said...

Whoa, you were right! Addy looks just like kale! Holy crap, they could be twins!
Sorry Kale's B-Day sucked, I hope he liked his presents. Let me know what he picked out at the store with his birthday money. Justin got two star wars action figures, Han Solo and Chewbaca, with his b-day money from you guys. He loves them, and he says thank you for his dollars.